That time we brought 4 small kids to a bar party...

Jason and I are still really new to this small town. We only know a small handful of people here. We haven't been invited to dinner (shocker!), we haven't been invited to anything really. But the interesting thing about moving to a small town is that everyone is super friendly, but they don't need new friends. So you have to work a lot harder to get to know people.

Add to the mix that it is super hard to get to know people when you have small humans running around your feet? Some of you are thinking, "No it's not!"And for my extroverted friends, it is a piece of cake to chat people up. But it really difficult for me. I'm a little socially awkward if I don't know people or if we don't have something in common that can drive the conversation forward. And conversations that can't go more than 2 minutes without interruption or distraction adds an extra really cute, but really loud hurdle.

Small kids + Introverted couple = A lot of nights in.

And that's okay with us. Jason and I like hanging out together!

It takes work to make new friends and I am ready and willing to make the effort as often as I can. This past week, I had just attended 2 class field trips where I was the only parent wrangling small children. I tried to meet a couple other parents but always was tugged away from the conversation by something or other. You know, like stopping toddler from running up to a predatory owl to give him a hug.

Or feeding hungry pigs and teaching the baby how to oink (important life skill that it is)

So when we were invited to a party here in town by a coworker of Jason (actually, the professor who told Jason about our small town which we fell in love with!) we were super pumped. We were told to bring the whole family and come out to their house for a fun fall party. And I was going to have another chance to meet some people!

The hosts have an 8 year old son who goes to school with the kids so this is going to be great. We will meet a bunch of people. Our kids can find some friends in town. I can scope out the other frazzled, multitasking, kickass moms of small kids and find a friend!

We dress the kids up a little for the party. It's all about the mind-games. A poorly behaved child who looks like he is presentable will be excused. "He's just tired" or "Oh poor thing, he's probably hungry." A sloppy child who is behaving poorly is a heathen. "That child was a mess! Did you see him!" You have to trick people into accepting your kids.

We arrive at the party, walk into a beautiful home in the woods, and look around for people. No one. We are told to check the bar downstairs...

*blink blink*

What? I shoot Jason a look of fear mixed with confusion.

We walk around the house to the newly renovated basement the hosts were so excited for everyone to see. It is a beautiful large basement with a full bar, a stage for a band, and adults. Lots of them. No one under 5 feet to be seen ANYWHERE.

But where is their son? Not here! It's a bar party...

Kill me.

The rest of the night was a bit of a blur. I drank a little wine. Cleaned up 400 spills on their newly installed flooring. Policed my children who ran up and down the newly carpeted stairs like they were wild apes on cocaine. Fed my children a few snacks from their fancy cheese tray table and refilled their water bottle a hundred times. Broke up 10 fights over the kettle corn dish. (Sorry about that - I hope no one else wanted any kettle corn?) And attempted 10 stunted conversations with really sweet adults. They really were the nicest group of people. So gracious to our tiny hoard of locusts.

---

My favorite conversation of the evening:

- Now, that little guy reminds me of my 5-year-old. He was crazy at that age too.

- Oh good, you survived! I like seeing people who make it through alive.

- They are so cute. *Kids thumping down stairs and shrieking*

- WHAT?

- OH! I JUST SAID THEY ARE SO CUTE!

- Oh thanks

- Do you know who that little girl with the curls belongs to?

- Oh she's mine too!

- WHAT? You have FOUR?!

---

At this point, one of the four required immediate assistance to get out of the way of 3 adults trying to get to the bottom of the stairs. I looked away from the conversation for 1 second, and when I looked back, the lady had already run away. I don't blame her. It was a bar party after all. Everyone had hired babysitters so they could enjoy their evening. I wanted to yell, "WE DIDN'T KNOW?!?!" but I thought that would just scare everyone. They didn't even notice my inner turmoil. And thought my kids were sweet and cute. And that I was a nice mom. But the struggle was real.

There was a fight over a large toy truck. We put Netflix on my phone and gave it to Roman. The phone died shortly after. The band started. We got the hell out of there. 

Look, it was super nice to extend an invitation to a family with young children and make them feel welcome by inviting all of them to your party. This is the beginning of us getting to know people in town! Unless they run away from us if they ever see us in public again. 

But had we known, we would not have brought our 4 small children to a bar party...

Our sincere apologies

Camping with kids (Also filed under "Parenting on Display")

No but seriously, camping with kids is the best thing since sliced bread.

I had to push aside my fears of "inconveniencing others" and parenting on display for the world to scrutinize and judge. But hey, I'm willing to be fodder for your sinful conversation if it means I get to do this all weekend!! (I know I look like I'm in pain. I'm not. The flash BLINDED me!!)

Jason and I have wanted to camp since before we got married. We had all the awesome stuff for camping on our wedding registry, but I guess when people saw that we didn't even have cutlery, a pot, or a vacuum, the camping stuff was less urgent. Looking back, it is better that we were gifted this stuff or we would still be washing and reusing plastic forks because we are both money hoarders so frugal.

Anyway, we were gifted a tent by a large family looking to upgrade. And FINALLY were able to plan ahead for camping. Jason's Christmas stash looked like an outdoors store threw up under our tree. And he was itching to get a chance to use it all. Backyard camping is fun, but you don't really need your propane stove and mini axe.

But you know where a mini axe comes in handy? In the wild!! NATURE!!!!

I think it was right about this time that an older couple pulled into the campsite next door to us. While they were scoping out the perfect location to put their tent, I jokingly said, "You should put it as far away from us as possible!"

HAHA. Right?

Our ever-so-tactful neighbor replied with, "Yeah, when we pulled in, I said to my husband, 'Oh no, a baby.'"

She was met with an icy cold stare and awkward silence. Because what do you even say to that? Once I recovered, I told her she didn't need to worry about the baby. It was the loud 3 year old that might drive them insane. Cue awkward laughter...

And I told Bridget to go wake them up bright and early each morning.

KIDDING!!!!

Aside from the stress of parenting my children in front of 200 strangers (it was packed!), our first camping weekend as a family was amazing. I'm antsy to go back. Without the rain ending our trip early next time! I sat outside reading, sipping coffee, watching my kids play, and talking to my husband. And when I got cold at night, I grabbed a couple kids and sandwiched myself in between them. What is better than that???

Okay so let's talk real quick about the awesome camping gear we had and what we wished we had!

We brought my beloved cast iron skillets for cooking over the fire, but there wasn't enough room over the fire for the entire meal, and it just got too smoky and hot. This outdoor kitchen is awesome for the extras! We put our Propane Stove on top and were able to make pancakes, sauteed veggies, and campfire coffee (which is all you really need, amiright?!).

Okay there were only a couple other things we had that were ESSENTIAL!

A basic kitchen utensil kit. This little kit has all the cooking essentials. Except garlic. Never leave the garlic behind!

God bless this portable fan.

We won't need it for fall or spring camping, but it was 95 all weekend and we would have been too uncomfortable to sleep without this fan!!

We actually don't need a ton of stuff when we go camping. Our kids were so well occupied all weekend with activities and meeting other campground friends that any other stuff we brought was ignored. Most of our activities centered around cooking.

Fact: Bacon cooked over a fire tastes better.

The kids spent a ton of time in the stream catching crawfish, reading books, canoeing, learning from the Park Rangers, hiking, and catching (and naming) crickets.  It makes me wish we had gone camping SO much sooner!! 

And the only thing that would have made this camping trip more perfect (aside from a large tarp so we didn't get rained out...newbie mistake):

A camping hammock! Or 3. We are going to try to buy at least one of these before we head out camping again in October. They were all OVER the campsite! I assumed they were too expensive for us, but they are actually affordable!

I have 1 month of prep time before we go camping again. What am I missing? What are your camping must-haves?

{this post contains Amazon affiliate links}

The 90s never looked so good

I am a woman of minimal fashion skills or sense. I wore overalls for about 10 years. Everywhere. I wore them to the bar, the park, 7-11, Walmart. I didn't wear them to church. That would just be indecent.

But I loved them so much I bought a pair of maternity overalls when I was pregnant with Leo. Is there anything more unattractive than a large pregnant woman in overalls?  (Don't ever google the phrase most unattractive. Consider yourself warned.)

Okay so let's just say that at 34, overalls are out for good. Unless I lose so much weight that they look good on me again. Then I'm bringing them back. Oh you know what?!  I'm going to make a sweet pair of overalls my weight loss present! You know, the present you splurge on when you finally reach your goal weight?? Here will be my inspiration board:

You know you want those overalls!!

Well, since the 90s obviously never went out of style (proof: they are still selling overalls), I am also rockin' some awesome Birkenstocks courtesy of the husband who knows me so well:

Just kidding!!!! 

(I know a few of you cringed thinking I had gone back to my old ways...)

Here are my new sweet kicks:

I have to share them with you for a couple reasons. 

First, they are adorable. (Look at all my mini hippies in their brown sandals!! May the 90s live on forever!!)

Second, I had no idea Birkenstocks went and created such comfortable shoes that were so cute!

I am in a group on Facebook where someone asked what everyone's favorite shoes for summer were. I have been living in various shades of $10 flip flops for the last 8 years so these women were a treasure trove of information with their recommendations.  I told Jason that I wanted adult sandals (not flip flops) that were super girly and comfortable. And so Jason ordered these for my birthday.

I am just so excited that Birkenstocks are hip again. (Or did they just never really go out of style, hmmm?) I remember being talked into going on a date with a guy I did not connect well with. In order to dissuade him from asking me on a second date, when he arrived to pick me up I was making shrinky dinks and wearing baggy jeans, a man's wool sweater, and birkenstock's with huge woolly socks...he ended up asking me to marry him. (Not Jason) So maybe we don't give these shoes enough credit for the power they have held over the last couple decades??  

Birkenstock Yara Thongs

I know they are summer shoes, but I'm already buying woolly socks so I can squeeze into these year-round. Bringing back the 90s one small step at a time!!  I will always be #TeamBirkenstock.

I think I've proven my point.

{this post has Amazon.com afffiliate links!}

What I have been up to!

Totally worth the
morning sickness!!!!

So everyone knows that shortly after we moved to Texas, I was unable to continue blogging. It was a mixture of lots of things, all good! I had such an AMAZING community in Tyler that I was mostly "talked out" by the end of the day. I also had lots of life changing moments:

• A general displacement from moving across the country for the first time with three kids 3 and under. SO glad I never have to do that again!! ;)

• A brand new addition to our family who is as cute as she is chubby.

• The addition of homeschool for my oldest. That was actually kind of awesome. I miss it a lot but life started to pull me in a different direction!

• My volunteer work: I volunteered for our farmer's market, ran a foodclub out of my house, and I volunteered for a couple other non-profits in town.

At the end of last year, Jason and I were scratching our heads trying to figure out how to remedy the problem of money. Our problem is that we didn't have any! The only solution was to get rid of our stupid student loan payment, which wasn't happening anytime soon. (Go ahead - ask me my opinion on college debt. I dare you.) 

So, after realizing that I spent as much time volunteering as I could working a real job to earn real money instead of free veggies at the market (though I never tire of free food!!!) I started looking for work-from-home opportunities online using my past experience as a secretary (PC: administrative assistant, executive assistant). I found a ton of companies who contract out to the lowest bidder and I spent TWO MONTHS bidding on jobs with hourly rates in the single digits and still lost every one of them to some dude in Singapore who would do jobs for less than a dollar an hour. 

I finally made the decision before Christmas to just go for it and start my own business!! I launched my website in the beginning of January and it has taken off since. I decided that I am of more value to my family contributing to our family income rather than saving money by homeschooling. I'm loving every minute of the work I do too.  I have realized that I love doing the work that the average person can't stand!!

I am always looking for new clients so I want to make sure you all know what I can do and can help me spread the word! Here are a few examples of what I do and who I work with:

ANYONE! 

Seriously, I work with anyone who needs any kind of help. I do document preparation, website design, bookkeeping, file organization, social media marketing, consulting for start-ups, proofreading and editing, etc. I have clients who range from engineers to farmers. I work with business who have staff or small-business owners who just work on their own. I work with writers, bloggers, overwhelmed moms, small-business start-ups, online storefronts and everything in between.

The way it works is that people purchase a package of hours and let me when they have a need. I take care of it, subtract that from their total hour package and then we keep going. 

• I'm not on your payroll
• You don't pay for my health insurance 
• You only purchase and use what you need
• No minimum or maximum of monthly/yearly work ever!

Just for fun, if you have anyone in mind who you think would benefit by working with a virtual assistant, send them my email address: lisa@virtualdeskassistant.com and this blogpost with a coupon for 25% their first 10 hour package! They will get a free consultation with me to chat about needs and to make sure I can help them out first.

Thank you everyone for helping me to reach out far and wide to expand my new company!!!

Is it time to resurrect the blog?

PART 1: 

I'm wondering if it is?!

We just moved across the country from Tyler, Texas, our home for the last 3 years, to Dickson, Tennessee!

I suppose that major life change is worth of a blog post or two. And we had a baby! I should update the header...

Updates:

Jason & I: 

Jason was offered a job as the Director of the Catechist Formation Program at Aquinas College in Nashville. Although the job is an absolute dream job for him, we agonized over the decision to leave Tyler, Texas because of our awesome relationships and community there. We made a lot of life-long friends and are going to miss them SO much!  (*sob...boo...* I miss you all!!!!!)

Just a few of the amazing friends I made!!

Me: I started my own business this past January! I am the Virtual Desk Assistant! I combined my experience as an administrative assistant for years in Corporate America with my experience running the foodclub for over 2 years in Texas and decided to stop giving away my services and start getting paid for them! It is going better than I could have imagined and I am gearing up to find and add a few more clients as soon school starts for the kids! 

If you know of any small businesses who could use a little administrative help, website help or marketing help, send them my way!

I also just started attacking my health. I wasn't able to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight after Bridget was born last summer. I have tons of excuses but won't bore you with them. So after months of thinking about getting started, I finally bit the bullet and bought my first supply of Plexus Slim.  I was finally able to kick the sugar habit by killing the candida overgrowth. I no longer have sugar or snack cravings and I'm able to control my eating daily to stay in a healthy calorie range for weight loss! I am working out, feeling great, losing weight and ready to shed the extra pounds! And now I'm starting with Trim Healthy Mama and I'm absolutely loving how it blends with traditional and whole foods eating. I even get to resurrect my sourdough starter :)))

But they were worth it!!!

(...stay tuned for the update on the kids in Part 2!!)

(This post contains affiliate links)

7 Quick Takes (#54)

It's either this or laundry...

1) Lots of you already saw this on my facebook page, but I'm so proud of him I have to post it here too!!  Leo finished the phonics program at Christmas with only a few difficulties.  We immediately jumped into the next part of the school year: McGuffey's Eclectic Primer.  I was excited for this part, but a little nervous since I already knew that he might have a hard time with reading.  

McGuffey's gave us a run for our money.  For a little less than 2 weeks, we plugged away trying to read words and sound them out.  Trying to put sentences together.  Trying to cheer and encourage as the concept clicked.  But Leo was soooo frustrated.  He spent the last 3 days in tears and so I put the book away and polled Facebook for a solution.  90% of the responses were in favor of Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons, so I jumped on the bandwagon and bought it.  After about 14 lessons, we picked up McGuffey's one more time to see if it was something we could add back in and Leo read the first couple pages with NO PROBLEMS!!  No crying or frustration. And he was sooo proud of himself.  

When we actually do arts and crafts, I take a million pictures.  All 2 times.  Of course, I have none of him reading!

I'm not proud of Leo THAT he can now start to read.  I don't buy into the hype that children in Kindergarten have to learn how to read.  (Jason and I are pretty darn articulate and we spent our half-days of Kindergarten painting pictures, singing songs, and trying not to have accidents in public.)  I'm proud of the way he handled the stress of learning how to read.  He was beating himself up pretty bad when the concept wasn't clicking.  But he kept trying each day without giving up and I'm really happy that in the end, he emerged victorious.  Seeing the look on his face when we revisited McGuffey's Primer and he crushed it, the source of his angst and frustration, was soooo worth the effort!!

This first year of homeschooling has been such a fun ride so far and I never imagined I would actual like it.  I'm glad we started now so we can continue if we want!  I think we will still take the decision year by year, but I am feeling more inclined to say homeschool forever after this last year!!  

Although it does have its downsides...

2) I had a MUCH needed Mom's night out with our local Catholic Moms Group and we made these Lenten centerpieces.  

It was only $6 and almost everything came from The Dollar Store!  Except the tree branches and glue guns.  Seriously - if you have a couple girlfriends, a few bottles of wine and some brownies, this is the perfect hangout activity to prep for Lent!

You need:

Pottery

Glue Guns

Rocks

Ribbon (for burial cloth)

Fake grass

Twine

Twigs for crosses

Or you could go all over-achiever on this project and use real grass: tutorial

Credit

3) February is birthday month for us.  Roman's 2nd birthday was the 15th and Elena's is tomorrow!

2 years old!!

He helped make the cake :)

He is a pirate.  And he means business

No seriously - do NOT mess with him.

Cousins came to play for the entire weekend.  I LOVE having family close enough to drive over for a party!!  

4) My 4 year old!!!!

This picture cracks me up.  It looks completely normal until I noticed WHO she is staring at like this:

*heehee!!!*

5) Miracle of miracles!!!  It snowed for 30 minutes in Texas!!!!!!

I think I heard 99% of you scoff from your northern homes.  I recognize the silliness of this "news".  But I refuse to post things about weather on Facebook so this is my only outlet.  When you are all snowed in for weeks at a time, we are outside enjoying the weather.  It all comes full-circle when the heat and humidity kills us in the summer, but I don't want to torture you all regularly by showing our shirt/shorts combos in February.

6) Hi.  My name is Lisa.  And I am a Legomaniac.

Leo got this huge Lego set and he isn't old enough yet to put all the pieces together by himself.  I spent no less than SEVEN HOURS putting together the firehouse, a helicopter, airplane, ladder truck, rescue boat, rescue car and motorcycle.

And I loved every.minute.  I can't believe I'm 32 and I have never played with legos before.  But it was oddly cathartic to work on building each individual piece and see it through to the end.  I feel like I should put a set on my wishlist for my birthday.  I liked it THAT MUCH!

7) But something I like more than legos is dessert.  I decided to make a Chocolate Eclair Cake completely from scratch.  I thought finding a recipe to put this cake together would be relatively easy but I was SO WRONG!  I searched the internet for over an hour to try to find the recipes I needed.  This meant: no graham crackers, no "no-bake" cake, no instant packages of vanilla pudding, and no cool whip!  I wanted the real thing.

I had to combine three recipes in order to make this bad boy.  This eclair cake, these classic eclairs, and this whipped cream.  For ease of making this in the future, I am going to list the directions and ingredients.  If you get a wild hair and love boston creme donuts as much as I do - definitely make this!!!

Chocolate Eclair Cake completely from scratch

Chocolate Eclair Cake

Ingredients:

Pastry Puff:

(from here)

1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter 

1 cup water 

1 cup unbleached all purpose flour 

4 large eggs 

Chocolate Filling: 

(from here)

2 ounces semisweet chocolate (or chocolate chips)

2 tablespoons butter 

1 teaspoon vanilla extract 

1 cup confectioners' sugar 

3 tablespoons hot water

Vanilla Custard Cream Filling:

(from here)

12 egg yolks 

4 cups whole milk 

1 1/2 cups sugar 

2 tbsp vanilla extract 

1/2 cup flour 

1 stick butter

Whipped Cream Topping:

(from here)

2 cups heavy cream

2 tsp vanilla extract

2 tbsp confectioners' sugar

Instructions

Preheat oven to 400 F.

For the Pastry:
1) In a large heavy saucepan, heat butter and water to boiling over medium-high heat. Add flour and reduce heat to low. Cook and stir until it forms a ball and pulls away from the pan.
2) Remove from heat and transfer to a large bowl. Beat in eggs, one at a time, beating well after each egg.
3) Spread in bottom and up the sides of an ungreased 9x13 inch pan.
4) Bake at 400 degrees F for 35 minutes. Cool completely.

For the Chocolate Filling: 
1) Melt chocolate and butter in a pan on low heat stirring constantly until smooth.
2) Stir in vanilla.
3) Sift in the powdered sugar, a little at a time, stirring as you go. Dribble water in to the mixture until smooth and spreadable (you may or may not use all the water).
4) Spread over the cooled pastry.

For the Custard:

1) Whisk the egg yolks, sugar and flour together in a large bowl. 

2) Bring milk to a boil. Slowly pour the milk into the egg yolk mixture, continuously whisking. This is called ‘tampering the yolks’. 

3) Pour the mixture back into the pot and bring to a boil, continuously stirring and going along the bottom of the pot in zigzag motion with a rubber spatula, to prevent scorching. It WILL stick if you stop. Cook for 1-2 minutes. Remove from heat. 

4) Add the vanilla extract & butter. Allow the butter to melt and stir for it to incorporate. 

5) Cover the custard with plastic wrap it touches the custard. To speed up the process you can transfer the custard into a jelly-roll pan, spread it thin, covering with plastic wrap will avoid skin formation. Refrigerate until ready to use.

For the whipped cream topping:

In a large bowl, whip cream until stiff peaks are just about to form. Beat in vanilla and sugar until peaks form. Make sure not to over-beat, cream will then become lumpy and butter-like.

Putting it all together:

When the puff pastry has cooled, spread the chocolate on the puff pastry.  Spread the custard on top of that and top it with the whipped cream.  Enjoy!!!