Potty-training is making me fat...

Dear Lisa,

You are not potty-training.  You do not need a treat every time your son goes pee in the potty.  Stop it.

Sincerely,

Your New Year Resolution to stop being so fat.


In retrospect, I should have sent Jason to the store to buy Leo's potty-training treats.  He would have picked beef jerky and hot dogs. 

I am impervious to the taunts of jerky and hot dogs.  I am completely powerless to the candy-coated-chocolatey-goodness of the M&M.

And I'm still not sure Leo is my son.  He ate half a cookie and then placed it on the table next to me.  I left it on the table...for 3 seconds.  Then I ate it.

I am supposed to say no thanks?!?!?!

And yes...that is an empty salad bowl next to him.  I ate the salad for lunch in an effort to be on top of my calories today.  The taste of the M&M is like a special kind of drug.  By 2:30, I'll be over the amount of calories a normal person gets in a day.  I have issues.
Next time, I'm just going to buy Buzz jammies and more monster tattoos.  Those are all he wants anyway. 

(The above letter to myself was completely tongue-in-cheek.  I do not think I am fat.  I just think I need to stop eating treats and candy 24/7.  I work very hard to save enough calories for a delicious dinner.  If all my calories are spent on M&M's and cookies that taste like cardboard-wrapped-chocolatey-things, that means I only get a salad for dinner again.  And we all know that's not happening!!)

5 comments:

  1. LOL...potty training did a lot of things to me. Not sure I can credit it with making me fat (already was), but definitely losing my hair!

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  2. Ha! I personally think you deserve a massive treat. Potty training is hard work.

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  3. cute jammies. my son has those ones too. I don't get kids. How could they take a bite out of cookie and walk away???? My kids do that. If I were to give them candy or cookies etc they bite one morsel off and are done. I go around the house and find half eaten goodies all the time. More for me i guess.

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  4. Potty training is a lot of hard work for both of you. I think you deserve just as many treats as Leo :)

    On the cookie note...when we get restaurant food, Eamon prefers to order apple slices or oranges INSTEAD of french fries. Where did this kid come from?? They never cease to amaze me....

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  5. Lisa, you are funny. I think there's a reason Moms are generally a little rounder and softer than your average female...it is this thing called finishing what our children start. After all, there are children starving somewhere in the world and we shouldn't waste food, right? I applaud you for being conscious of calories and making an effort to balance out what you eat throughout the day even if you miss your personal mark every now and again. I packed on some serious extra baggage over the holidays and need to scale back. There's just one small problem: I love food, especially sweets! *sigh*

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